I was a sociology and religious education double major in college. (Don’t ask me what I thought I was going to do with that – that’s the topic of a whole other blog.) My college roommate was also this combo. We took a lot of classes together. Lived together, took classes together and were even in each others weddings later (she was my maid of honor). We liked each other all those years which is an incredible accomplishment for girls!
In one of our classes (I believe it was theory), we were asked what we wanted to do with our lives. Without hesitation, we both responded that we wanted to be Moms. We were practically mauled by the other women in the class. "Why are you even in college?" "You're wasting your time!" "What? Are you hear for your MRS degree?" We clearly said something that was not politically correct, or, at the very least, not of popular opinion. Even the men in the class were apalled.
So what is wrong with being a mom? I have a good life. I have two wonderful boys who keep me busy and a network of moms I can hang out with. I have a husband who pays the bills. I work part time and get to dabble in what my future will hold once I raise my boys. I have a career that I could go into full time and make one hell of a living if I wanted to. But that’s not my choice right now. Sometimes I do the math and think, “Whoa... I would make more than Dear Hubby if I worked full time.” But he does not want to be a stay at home dad and I don’t want anyone else to raise my kids. It is OUR decision and it is the right one for US at this point in time.
Are we that far gone as a culture that women are not allowed to be what they WANT to be. If I had a daughter who wanted to be a doctor, a lawyer or musician, I would be happy for her and support her in any way I could. Why would it be any different if she wanted to be a nurturer of children?
I reflect on this quite a bit since when I am asked what I do for a living, I often hesitate before answering, "Mom." Why is that? I certainly don't sit around and eat bon-bons all day! It is hard work! As women, we need to give each other a little more credit and respect. Then, and only then, things may change!
My favorite quote ever…
"I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat, or a prostitute." (Rebecca West 1913)
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Wow, I remember that day (I am the friend..:)) We did remain friends. Cool!
It never ends does it? Right now, I am not working. My days are full volunteering and helping my husband minister to his unit. I don't really want to go back to work, but I am made to feel so guilty, even by my family. And since I don't have kids, I really don't have a leg to stand on. When it comes down to it, I think feminism is about having choices in life, and not being told to live one way or the other. It's amazing how it doesn't play out that way in the real world.
Well said.
Being a stay at home mom is the best gift you can give your children. I feel so blessed that my mom stayed home and we as a family sat down to dinner together every night. It's a wonderful thing you are doing for your boys.
Amen.
And I certify you as a feminist in good standing!
for what it's worth...
Thanks! It means a lot! :)
Post a Comment