When I was about 13 years old, my parents were told that I'd neer have children due to my extreme endometriosis. As a teenager, it never bothered me. I liked kids. Other people's kids. Then when I got married, I was so terrified of the financial burden of having children (can you tell we lived in New Jersey?), that I stayed on the pill "just in case."
When we finally decided it was time to start a family, I got pregnant right away. And then miscarried.
It was horrible. I remember going to the doctor (who was a male OBGYN) and venting my frustration. He told me that he just "knew" how much I wanted a baby. Um.... Really? And that it would happen. Eventually. Plus, it was good news that I had a miscarriage. This meant that I COULD get pregnant, which was the hurdle we never thought we'd jump.
Yes folks. A male OB told me that it was "good news" that I miscarried.
I am still not sure how I prevented myself from bitch-slapping him.
When I eventually did have my first son, affectionately nicknamed Big Love, I was able to reflect on it all in a positive light. I had my child. For me, the fertility battle was over. And I had won. I beat the stupid doctor. I beat my scarred uterus.
But I hope I never forget the bad bedside manner of someone who told me they got it but never really could.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
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